These 35 horse puns will make you whinny and neigh while you clutch your sides. This piece is sure to become a mane-stay in your library of comedy bookmarks because these puns are absolute barnburners. If you don’t believe us, take a look for yourself. If animal puns tickle your funny bone, check out our other hilarious collections of animal puns and jokes, but not before you scroll down this list of 50 great horse puns. We’re not just horsing around either, these jokes are worth the price of admission. Sit back, relax, and check out the 50 funniest horse puns on the internet.
Horse Puns
You’ll never find a horse using an Android phone. They only like Apple’s. What did the mare say to her foal? “It’s pasture your bedtime.” Why did the horse run away in the middle of its wedding?It got colt feet! What kind of medicine do you give a sick horse? Cough stirrup. That horse is so spontaneous. It always does things in the spur of the moment! What do you call a horse that’s not wearing a saddle?Neigh-ked! When does a horse talk? Whinny wants to. Why did the farmer give his pony a cough drop? Its throat was a little hoarse. Why did the little pony wake up scared?It had a night-mare! Where do newlywed horses stay after their wedding?In the bridle suite! What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bor. What’s a horse’s favorite football team? The Broncos. Did you hear what happened at the racetrack yesterday? One horse was so slow, they had to pay the jockey overtime. This one horse always has a bad attitude. She keeps saying, “Neigh.” Who do ponies call when they’re possessed by demons?An ex-horse-ist! How do you get a jockey to wait a moment?Tell him to hold his horses! Why was the horse feeling so stressed?It was saddled with responsibility! Where do horses get their hair done? At the hair saloon. Do you know why horse stalls at the racetrack are labelled A, B, D, E, and F? Because no one wants to bet on a seahorse. What song makes a horse want to get up and dance? Watch me whip…watch me neigh, neigh! Look at that horse’s new boyfriend. He’s such a stud! How do horses cast their vote?By saying yay or neigh! Where do horses love to shop? Old Neigh-vy. What do horses see right before it thunders?Lightning colts! What do you call a horse that’s a world traveler?A globe-trotter! There’s only one time vampires like watching a horse race. When it’s neck and neck. What’s a racehorse’s favorite thing to eat? Fast food. A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asked him, “Why the long face?” What’s the quickest way to send a horse mail? Using the Pony Express. What did the horse say after it fell over? “Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy-up!” Why is it hard so hard to carry on a conversation with racehorses? They don’t stand around furlong! What street do horses live on? Mane Street. What do you call a well-balanced horse? Stable. What do you say to a horse after it loses a bet?Pony up! What’s the difference between horses and zebras? Zebras are just horses that have escaped from prison. Check out…101 Clean Jokes101 Corny Jokes200+ Jokes for Kids50 Dog Puns50 Cat Puns
